Timeline of Events

MY TIMELINE OF EVENTS LEADING TO THE INEVITABLE…

4/20- The tumor I had was self found during my menstrual cycle. My right breast was more tender than usual and the bump was very palpable meaning it was definitely something you could feel with your fingers. I noticed it last month but I didn’t think anything of it because I knew girls my age get “cysts” right? Nothing to worry about? Little did I know..

4/22- I decided to get a breast examination with a breast specialist. She told me that she was 96% SURE that it was just a CYST. She did a full exam and was almost sure that it was nothing but a large cyst. Just to be sure, she ordered for me to get a breast ultrasound.

4/27- Got the ultrasound. Man, the pressure was intense. They noticed abnormal cells in the breast tissue. Mind you, I was ONLY mentally prepared for an ultrasound. They ordered more tests..within the next 2 hours: (They didn’t give me much time really so the entire time, I was by myself) Crazy, I tell you!!

Okay, so after the ultrasound, I get the following tests:

  1. A Mammogram - I never thought I would have to get this until I was 35! I’m not going to lie. It hurt like hell because I had a large lump, I was on my cycle, and I had intense anxiety. Yes, at this point. I cried. The nurse felt sorry for me.
  2. A Core Needle Biopsy- This is where they take samples of the tissue from the tumor to determine if it’s benign or malignant. All I remember the doc saying was “Okay Michelle, don’t Jump when you hear a loud gun noise”. I was like WTF?! You gotta be kidding me? Actually, it wasn’t that bad. The mammogram hurt more.


2 days later…

4/29- I just finished eating lunch with my dear friend, Olga. After lunch, I came back to the office when I got the long awaited call on my cell phone. The phone rang once. I picked up and answered, went to my bosse’s office and shut the door. The voice on the other end was my breast specialists, Susan. After greeting me, all she she said was “I’m sorry Michelle”. I took deep breaths and acted as if I didn’t hear her because I knew already. Oddly, after all these tests leading up to this call that would literally change my life, it’s like I knew. All the evidence was there. She then proceeded to tell me, “Your test results came out Positive”.. Your tumor is “malignant”.. then slowly said You have Breast Cancer“.  WOW- She pretty much broke it down more ways than one- as clear as can be. At that moment, I felt the dark walls of the office caving in on me like I was trapped in a box- no where to go and no where to hide. I felt completely numb all over my body. If you tried passing my way or attempted to distract me, I probably wouldn’t have noticed. I closed my eyes as my lids were in a quiver and kept saying “This is not happening to me” repeatedly like  a broken record. “Oh my God. Oh my God” 10x’s I said. Angrily, I got back on the phone and I was more enraged and almost ballistic “So, does this mean I’m going to die?” I mean the “C”(cancer) word is usually connected with the “D” (death) word if you know what I mean.  She told me to not think like that and to take it one step at a time. I stayed on the phone with her while she muttered a few words that honestly sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher. My life didn’t flash before my eyes like they do in the movies but what I do remember  was breathing heavily. I didn’t cry right away. Instead, I was still. Very still. I eventually hung up with her and I continued to sit in that office for a good 10 minutes head down, eyes shut, still. Luckily she prescribed Xanax anxiety pills that same day to help me calm the heck down. Minutes later, my bosses and co-workers came to rescue me from my unfortunate news. We just prayed and prayed and sat and talked. That is when the water works began. I cried but not in a obnoxious way -it was more like tears would fall without any expression on my face. Crazy huh?! Gives me the chills just re-visiting that moment. That was my turning point.

So after all that, I was ordered more and more tests.. To name a few:

  1. MRI
  2. BSGI (Breast Specific Gamma Imaging)
  3. Chest X-Ray
  4. Full Bone Scan
  5. PET Scan-Detects other tumors
  6. CT Guided Biopsy- Yes, I had another biopsy. This one was in another area of my body too! yikes!
  7. Echocardiogram
  8. More Ultrasounds

After ALL That mumbo jumbo, I’m FINALLY in treatment and they’ve decided to do the Chemo before surgery to shrink my tumor. I will then proceed with Radiation therapy later down the road.

So, as you can see, after getting diagnosed, it’s only the beginning of more tests to come and YES, it’s all quite draining mentally and physically. My advice is if you feel anything, just get a check up. Remember, most cysts are benign (non-cancerous). It’s normal for us women to get those so don’t be afraid. I just happened to fall in the malignant (cancerous) group. I guess you can say I’m the other 4% from the 96% she told me originally.

The crazy thing about cancer is it doesn’t hurt. That’s what sucks. It’s almost like a silent killer so it’s good to catch it before it turns into a later Stage or spreads. I probably had the tumor for months but just didn’t feel a darn thing.

Hope my story didn’t scare you. It’s the harsh reality of this disease but what’s so awesome is you still have a chance to do something about it. It’s okay to be scared but it’s better to take a stand and take control of the situation. Remember, it may be nothing but confirming that will lift a great weight off your shoulders. Trust me.